Is there no balm in Gilead? Is there no physician there? Why then is there no healing for the wound of my people? (Jeremiah 8:22 (NIV))
My spirit was in pain. It ached from a long season of loss, grief and change. Life no longer made sense to me. The world around me seemed to be crumbling. Myriads of thoughts consumed me, but I could not pen them to paper. This wanderlust was not new. In fact, I have been here many times before, only this time I seemed to have lost my way.
I thoughtlessly reopened many wounds of the past and had neither the desire nor power to address them. Prayer was no longer a priority. Quality time alone with God no longer seemed to matter. Studying God’s Word was not on my agenda. Even the usually effective scriptural post-it notes, I plastered around the house seemed no more than clutter, until I found and read anew my favorite Proverb, “Trust in the Lord with all of your heart. Lean not to your own understanding, acknowledge Him in all your ways and He will direct your path.”
I cried, “Lord I do trust you. I need you. Please help me.” It was then I recalled the attitude of the Gospel singing artist, who in the midst of his darkest moments, determined his need for time away from active ministry, to simply sit in the pews and to allow God’s Word to heal him. It finally dawned on me that I too needed this time away. I needed time for self-care. While I did not understand it before, as a Pastor and Preacher, God’s Word had become a tool to bless others while my spirit starved and became gravely ill from lack of care. I am so grateful that God can bring anything out of intensive care.
God doesn’t just give strength in our despairing moments—but uses every moment we despair to grow us spiritually. Our part is to acknowledge when we are hurt, confused, or wounded and apply God’s Word consistently to the places of pain. God’s Word is powerful–there is medicine in every word. It is a healing balm for wounded spirits. It is Divine “spittle” that opens blinded eyes. It is mesmerizing music that causes joyous singing in unlikely places. It can calm, soothe and keep you in perfect peace. But most of all, it heals all brokenness.
Renewed and restored, I have no doubt that God was there all the time, waiting patiently for me to admit my need. I found healing for my hurt in these words hidden long ago in my heart,“I shall not die, but live, and declare the works of the Lord.”(Psalm 118:17)
PRAYER: Thank you Father, for the reminder that physicians need healing too. Touch, teach and abide with us. Lead us to the depths of your Word. Heal our hearts, mend our spirits and make us whole again. For Thy Son’s sake we pray. Amen